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The undead Tories are seeking new victims

Paddy's take on the week's politics

You’ve got to love… no, sorry despise, our politicians. Easy mistake to make, they do it all the time.

They say a country gets the politicians it deserves. Well, all I can say is we must have been a bad bunch of budgies recently if this current crop is anything to go by.

It takes something special in this era of anni horribilis, omni-shambles and good old fashioned incompetence to get yourself noticed amid the general bastardry and nefarious mendacity that passes for parliamentary politics in this day and age.

Some are called to gittery and others have it thrust upon them. Still more are just so obnoxiously offensive that they would be culled in any other walk of life.

Cue Iain Duncan Smith…

Yes, you probably thought (quite rightly) that you loathed the Tory golem before this week.

Well, in the words of Bachman Turner Overdrive… “you ain’t seen nothing yet.”

At a time when politicos of all stripes are desperately attempting to shift their position to one slightly to the right of Goebbels in their scrabble to get re-elected IDS has a distinct advantage — that’s always been his default setting.

This week it emerged that, in his beneficence, the Work and Pensions Secretary has decided, somewhat arbitrarily and in the face of all medical evidence, that people suffering from chronic degenerative illnesses such as Parkinson’s and multiple sclerosis should have their benefits cut.

The rationale for this, we are informed by those medical experts at the DWP, is that basically they are malingerers whose conditions will improve to the extent that they will be fit for work.

Thousands of those with diseases that only worsen with time — and who have become too ill to work — are being denied full employment support allowance, being assessed as suitable for work-related activity instead.

Now, surprise, surprise, those in the work-related activity group receive less money and the threat of sanctions if they do not attend regular sessions.

Many also have this benefit slashed after a year as an added “incentive” to find employment.

Almost 8,000 people suffering from multiple sclerosis, spinal muscular atrophy, Parkinson’s disease, cystic fibrosis and rheumatoid arthritis have been put on this third, lesser benefit.

When this policy was condemned by charities supporting those with such conditions, a DWP spokesman claimed: “It’s not fair to write someone off as unable to work if they are at the early stages of a progressive condition — and many people welcome support to prepare for work if they feel able to.”

Well of course, you wouldn’t want to be unfair would you..?
 
And what could be more supportive than a gruelling and humiliating Atos assessment followed by a letter calling you a shirker and axing your financial lifeline?

They’re all heart at the DWP…

 “Our reforms support people into work where they are able, instead of writing them off,” he smirked.
 
Yes, you wouldn’t want to write someone off to a future made slightly more bearable by the receipt of paltry benefits, that’s just inhumane.

One might have imagined the Tories and Lib Dems would be more sympathetic to those suffering from chronic conditions.
Their own situations are looking pretty terminal at the moment.

Someone else who doesn’t have to goose-step far to adapt to the new (for which read “old”) political climate is Tory grandee and grand guignol grotesque Lord Tebbit, Baron of Chingford.

If there’s something of the blood sucker about IDS there’s a distinct whiff of the recently disinterred corpse about Tebbit.
You can imagine him roaming the corridors of Westminster late at night calling: “Brains! More brains.”

It’s a wonder he hasn’t starved to death given the vacuity of the majority of those ensconced there.

Tebbit is like the mad old uncle that you were always warned not to go near as a kid. Sitting there reeking of mothballs and death, normally asleep but occasionally rousing themselves to bellow xenophobic non-sequiturs at anyone they suspect may be within earshot.

Banging on about how Enoch Powell was right and bemoaning the fact you can’t flog foreigners any more.

His house probably has a welcome mat saying “No blacks, no dogs, no Irish.”

This week he continued his one man campaign to persecute the unemployed by suggesting they be put on work gangs pulling up ragwort to gain their pittance.

This, he said, would be a great boon to the poor, hard-done-by farmers in his constituency for whom the troublesome weed is apparently a source of some chagrin.

Now, some of you may be thinking that a significant proportion of farmers are true blue Tories grown fat off endless government subsidies and bogus foot in mouth scams and that therefore they could probably pay to have the weeds dug up themselves… But that is just malicious gossip.

They can’t be expected to do their own gardening as well as attend their local Conservative Association and drive Travellers off their land!

Have some humanity here people.

There is also no connection between the fact that it is very much the demographic the Tories are terrified of losing to Ukip.

Labour MP Chris Bryant accused Tebbit of adopting the politics of the workhouse and effectively criminalising the unemployed.
Actually its more like feudal serfdom. At least with the workhouse you have a roof over your head.

In other news it emerged on Thursday that Parliament will not appoint a Chief Mouser from Battersea Dogs and Cats Home despite the idea having “clear appeal” in tackling a “spiralling” rodent problem, MPs have been told.

Liberal Democrat John Thurso reported to the Commons that a study had shown because of the size of the Westminster estate, one or two rescue cats would not be enough and a “herd of cats” would not be manageable.

This column quite agrees.

It would take more than a moggy or two to clear that place of vermin.

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