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Sketch: Fine Filly Farage couldn't keep his nose out of the trough

THEY’RE under starts orders here at Doncaster racecourse … and they’re off. 

Fine Filly Farage, owned by the City of course, couldn’t keep his nose out of the trough in the traps and makes a slow start.

But driven on by Douglas Carswell, wearing purple and yellow spots today, he’s soon overtaking Dodgy Dave on his right flank around the Clacton corner. 

Now fearless Farage is trying to make ground on Man of the People Miliband at his home course. 

Perhaps he’s had a nibble of something from the Queen’s horse’s nosebag.

There’re roars of approval from the right-wing press as they approach the final hurdle and … OH, HE’S DOWN!

Fine Filly Farage is caught out at the last as he tries to explain what he’s got to offer to working people. 

Nothing on employment, welfare or the health. 

Where did it all go wrong? To find out we cross now to his trainer, Ms Thatcher. 

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